I asked a group of leaders to share their top five principles.
Turns out, most leadership advice splits into two camps: the foundational principles that make you who you are, and the operational ones that help you get things done. Both matter. Neither is complete without the other.
Here’s what I learned.
1. Complete ownership of every problem
Someone put it better than I could: complete ownership of every problem.
Not partial. Not when it’s convenient. Every single one.
This means when your team fails, you failed. When the project tanks, you tanked it. When someone quits because they felt unsupported, you didn’t support them.
It’s not about martyrdom. It’s about ending the blame game before it starts.
Most people say they do this. Few actually do. Because real ownership means sitting in the discomfort of knowing you could have done better, even when the failure wasn’t technically your fault.
2. Care about the people first, then their work
I heard this from someone who’s been leading teams for years: care about the people first, then their work.
Not the other way around.
Because when you reverse it, people feel it. They know when they’re a means to an end. And they’ll give you exactly the effort that transactional relationship deserves.
Caring personally doesn’t mean being soft. It means forming real relationships, well beyond job responsibilities. Getting to know their lives. Then, when you need to challenge them directly, when you need to call out what’s not working, you can do it without them wondering if you’re just protecting the bottom line.
One leader described it as “care personally, challenge directly.” Both parts matter. Skip either one and you’re just playing manager.
3. Let them fail sometimes
This one’s harder than it sounds.
Letting someone fail when you could have stepped in feels wrong. It feels like negligence. But sometimes the lesson they need can only come from the fall.
Not every failure. Not the catastrophic ones. But the ones where the stakes are manageable and the learning is essential.
Because if you never let them fail, you’re not building leaders. You’re building dependencies.
4. Take care of their money
Salary. Bonus. Timesheet. Expenses.
Most leaders think this is HR’s job. It’s not. It’s yours.
Because nothing says “I don’t actually care about you” faster than messing up someone’s pay, forgetting their bonus, or making them chase down expense reimbursements.
One person said employees are stakeholders. That’s exactly right. They’ve staked their time, their energy, their financial security on the bet that you’re worth following. The least you can do is make sure they get paid correctly and on time.
5. They get the praise, you take the blame
This is the clearest line between leaders and pretenders.
When things go well, the team gets credit. When things go poorly, you do.
Not because you’re noble. Because that’s the deal. That’s what you signed up for when you took the role.
I’ve seen managers do the reverse. Take credit for wins, deflect blame for losses. It works exactly once. Then everyone knows who you are.
Praise in public. Discipline in private. Simple. Surgical. Effective.
What this actually looks like
One leader summed it up: “The buck stops with me.”
Another said being understanding when employees face real problems, death in family, health issues, telling them to take the time they need regardless of PTO balances, will come back ten times over when they’ve dealt with it.
Let people put first things first. Work isn’t always first.
This isn’t soft. It’s strategic. Because people remember how you treated them when things were hard. And when you need them to run through a wall for you, they’ll remember whether you were there or not.
The principles you don’t hear enough
Someone shared a principle I hadn’t considered: do not let your compassion be weaponized against you.
That one landed.
Because caring about people doesn’t mean letting them exploit that care. Some will. And if you don’t set boundaries, you’ll burn out trying to save people who don’t want to be saved.
Another: do not show warmth when strategy already suffices.
Harsh. True. Because sometimes leaders confuse being liked with being effective. Warmth has its place. But if the problem is structural, warmth won’t fix it. Strategy will.
Lead by example
This showed up in nearly every list.
Not as a platitude. As a practice.
It means doing the mundane tasks from time to time. Showing the team you’re willing to get your hands dirty. Not performing humility, actually being in the work with them.
One person, military background, said it plainest: lead from the front. Focus on the mission. Treat your people like you’d want to be treated.
No fluff. Just practice.
Retrospectives and one-on-ones must happen even when the house is on fire
This principle came from someone who clearly learned it the hard way.
Because when things get chaotic, the first thing to go is usually communication. The check-ins. The debriefs. The space to process what’s happening.
That’s exactly when you need them most.
Skipping them saves time in the short term. Costs it in the long term. Because people lose alignment, lose context, lose trust.
Even 15 minutes. Even standing in the hallway. Keep the lines open.
What doesn’t work
Treating everyone the same.
I used to think this was the right move. It’s not. Not if you mean giving everyone equal time and attention.
Your top performers should need less of your time. Give them autonomy. Let them cook.
Your struggling performers need coaching. Time. Direction.
The principle isn’t equal treatment. It’s appropriate treatment. Respect for everyone, yes. But customized support based on what they actually need.
The operational layer
All of this, the care, the ownership, the autonomy, only works if you’re also operationally sharp.
One person, an executive with over a thousand employees, said: leading means you hit the objective.
Not that you tried. Not that you cared. That you delivered.
They also said: 10% C players on an A team make it a C team. Don’t accept it. Ship them out.
Brutal. Accurate. Because A players resent C players. C players drain energy. And if you’re conflict-avoidant about it, you’ll lose your best people to protect your worst.
The lists no one writes but everyone needs
Don’t be a dick.
That’s one person’s entire list. Five principles, all the same: see rule one.
It’s funny because it’s true. Most leadership failures come down to someone being a dick. Lying. Hiding. Blaming. Performing superiority.
Another person said: be your authentic self. No bullshit.
Same energy. Different words.
Because people can smell performance. And once they do, you’re done.
What I’m taking forward
Complete ownership. Care first, challenge directly. Let them fail sometimes. Take care of their money. They get the praise, I take the blame.
And underneath all of it: lead from the front. Hit the objective. Don’t be a dick.
That’s the synthesis. Foundation plus execution. Principles plus practice.
If you can do most of them, you’re leading.
If you can only do one, you’re pretending.
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Header photo by Johannes Plenio